Massage between couples is a beautiful experience. Here are 4 reasons why you should start massaging your spouse this Valentine’s Day…or any time of year!
Sponsored guest post by Emma Merkas of Melt
Your partner probably could do with a massage right around now. I bet you could, too! And you know what? You both deserve one. And who better to pamper you like that than your loving partner?
Massage between couples is a beautiful experience.
My husband and I have been massaging each other for ten years now – giving a romantic massage is something we do as a treat for the other, or when we feel like our marriage needs some extra loving, or connection.
It works so well that we now teach couples all over the world how to massage, because we believe every relationship can benefit from it.
I’m not a qualified massage therapist, but my husband Denis is. He is used to getting skilled massages from highly trained therapists – but I’ll let you in on a little secret: Even though I’m a complete amateur, he still adores the massages he gets at home from me.
That’s because I have a little edge over the professionals. As his wife, I can bring romance and intimacy to the massage in a big way. The massages I give my husband are unlike the ones anyone else can give him.
Denis taught me everything I know when it comes to massage, and over the past decade I’ve made sure I get plenty of practice honing my skills. Massage is beautifully simple when you know where to rub and how to do it. And scientifically speaking, it does amazing things for your relationship.
Here are four reasons you should consider massaging your sweetie – just in time for Valentine’s Day!
1. Giving your partner a massage is one of the most romantic things you will ever do
Looking for some romance? A massage is the perfect remedy. Candles, dim lighting, soft music, massage oil, quiet closeness… Offering your spouse a back rub is a giving, selfless act that will make them melt with gratitude and seriously ups the romantic ante in your love life.
The way we set up our massages at home makes them even more intimate than you can imagine – instead of lying down on the bed or at arm’s length on a massage table, we use what we call The Melt Set Up (Den’s invention), which is designed to get you much closer to your partner during your massage.
2. Massage radically builds your trust as a couple
Trust is an important part of any relationship, and one of those things you can never have too much of. Trust requires continuous work, and one of the most effective ways to achieve it is through massage and gentle touch, which has been proven to supercharge the trusting bond between couples.
Every massage session has that one point where your partner’s body simply gives in. If you’re paying attention, you’ll notice it happen as if you’ve flicked a light switch. That moment where they fall into deep relaxation and melt under the rhythmical motion of your hands is the moment you’ve gained their complete trust.
It’s a powerful moment to share. Becoming putty in your partner’s hands and likewise, having them surrender to you in the same unquestioning way, is a beautiful, comforting experience that has far-reaching benefits through your entire relationship.
3. Massage creates effortless intimacy
Intimacy is about being emotionally close to another person, and – despite popular thought – it is not an automatic occurrence in your relationship.
You need to carefully and purposefully cultivate intimacy with your spouse. Intimacy is about being vulnerable and still feeling safe. It’s formed in private moments, through shared experiences.
You can nurture this intimate connection by spending time alone together as a couple, concentrating on each other. This could be in any number of ways, though massage is an extremely effective way to achieve it.
When you massage, you are focusing your absolute attention on each other in a private space, alone together. Intimacy begets intimacy – try it and watch your connection to your spouse skyrocket.
4. Giving a massage inspires positivity and goodwill
While you’re massaging your spouse, there’s no time (or inclination) to discuss day-to-day routines like the kids, work issues or the mortgage and there’s no opportunity for distractions such as the phone, checking emails or thinking about chores.
When you massage each other, it feels so good that you don’t want to leave and go back to reality. Embrace that feeling.
When you’re in that space, it’s soft and romantic, calm and peaceful. You become attuned to one another. This connection and gratitude for each other doesn’t dissipate right away; it flows through the rest your interactions, inspiring positivity in your day.
Have you ever tried massaging your spouse?
Emma Merkas is a relationships expert and the co-founder of Melt: Massage for Couples, teaching couples how to massage each other via tasteful, sophisticated online streaming video.
Andrea
Touch is so powerful. I agree that it leaves positive feelings!
Emma Merkas
It really does Andrea! So many health benefits to massage, touch and even cuddling. It’s great for you and your relationship.
Lisa @ This Pilgrim Life
I’m always up for a massage! 😉 It is always one of the best ways for me to calm down and focus on just enjoying time with my husband.
Emma Merkas
I completely agree! I’ll take any massage I can get from hubby – anywhere and anytime! (It helps that he’s a professional at it too!)
Kristen Smith
Oo la la, I agree! My husband is so good about rubbing my neck and shoulders or feet and ankles at the end of a day. The ankles is a new one, though. When he was rubbing my feet one night, I told him my ankles were sore from standing most of the day with a baby. It’s now one of my favorite spots and can really put me to sleep quickly!
I do admit I receive more massages that I give, but I love it when he lets me rub his feet sometimes. 🙂
Emma Merkas
I love the ankles and feet too! There’s such great little nooks and crannies right around the ankle joint on either side, it feels amazing when someone gets in there properly!
Heather @ My Overflowing Cup
I couldn’t agree more, Emma! My husband rubs my feet almost every night. He rubs my neck, shoulders, and back when I am tense or hurting. He also gives me romantic, full-body massages from time to time. Not only does it feel wonderful and relaxing, but it makes me feel treasured because I know the love he is pouring in to what he is doing for me.
He, on the other hand, doesn’t care to be rubbed. I can’t understand it, but I find other ways to show him love.
Thanks for the post! This is a wonderful way to increase intimacy in a marriage.
Erin
That’s awesome that your husband gives you massages every night!
hilton massage
massage has too reduce stress of mind and reduction of body pain due to over burden of daily work in our life. massage is one of those things that makes life worth living!
Jennie BM
Unfortunately my significant other is nowhere near as skilled as he should be, so I ended up getting him a wand massager to use 🙂
genie miquela
feeling so happy and more healthy after get that massage 🙂
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