Buying Christmas gifts can be a difficult predicament for families on a budget. Purchasing them secondhand can make the holiday more doable, but are secondhand Christmas gifts really okay to give?
By Kristen Smith, Contributing Writer
I still remember that Christmas morning, opening up the game of Trouble. It was in an old beat up box, and in my 5-, 6-, or 7-year-old mind I just couldn’t understand what Santa and his elves were doing when they made it.
Where was quality control on this one? It was clearly not packaged in a sturdy, new, sharp-cornered box.
My sister and I were still happy to get the game, though I don’t know if the box was as perplexing to her as it was to me. I never voiced my concern for the elves’ work ethic, but it crossed my little mind from time to time when we’d play the game.
And then I grew up, had my own family, and learned about the magical reality of a budget. Ah, yes, the clearly used game of Trouble made a whole lot of sense then!
Thinking Through Secondhand Christmas Gifts
Obviously, secondhand Christmas gifts have a good thing going for them. Most obviously, they can potentially save families a lot of money! January need not bring painful credit card statements when gifts are bought secondhand.
Parents can shop for Christmas gifts through the whole year, always keeping an eye out at thrift stores and garage sales for items that their children would love and are in fantastic condition. The Black Friday madness can be avoided for the most part, as well, making holiday shopping so much simpler.
But all these benefits may not fully take away some nagging questions about secondhand gift giving.
Questions like:
- Don’t our children deserve the very best? And don’t the very best gifts require sacrifice? Is there really much sacrifice in secondhand gifts?
- What if Christmas becomes less special because these gifts aren’t brand new? Will our children look forward to it less? What happens when they realize that their gifts were bought at a thrift store?
- And above all else, do secondhand gifts really express love to our children? Won’t they feel less important to us when we buy their gifts secondhand?
Our Personal Decisions on Secondhand Gifts
Truthfully, when we were young parents with just a couple of young children, Christmas was an extremely small affair with no gifts. Our children were young enough to not know any different, and we didn’t have any extra money to spend.
Then as they became preschoolers and young children, we wanted to do something more for them. We wanted to make the day an expression of both our love for them and a tactical way to understand God’s love for all of us, but we still didn’t have a lot of extra income. We needed to keep Christmas gift-giving simple.
Enter thrift stores. I remembered my secondhand game of Trouble, and I knew that buying new need not be a must for us to make Christmas enjoyable for our children.
I have mostly bought clothing gifts for our children at the thrift store, though I’ve sometimes found great toys perfect for their interests at the time.
Even now that we have a more wiggle room in our budget thanks to my work from home, we still find secondhand gifts to be a budget-saver for us. Our large family continues to grow and any extra we can save is a blessing!
And our children haven’t minded one bit.
Making Secondhand Christmas Gifts Work
When buying secondhand gifts, I do try to keep a few things in mind:
- Is the item in like new condition?
- Will it be thoroughly enjoyed?
- If clothing, will it fit well and be comfortable? Are the seams and buttons tight?
- Could there be a negative reason why this item was taken to a thrift store?
These questions have made secondhand gifts a blessing both to our children and to our budget. No Scrooging allowed!
Jill
As a former kid who also got secondhand gifts I would just urge parents to remember that kids can tell when things aren’t fair – and it hurts! If you do a thrift store gift for one kid – do it for them all. I often felt “not as good as” when I got the rummage sale present and my siblings got new things.
In our house, we are not the kind of parents that buy our kids crap every time we go somewhere. Our kids hear “no, not right now” puh-lenty of times. Therefore, for Christmas and Birthdays, they do get new presents, only because gift giving and material “treats” are so rare.
For adults, I think you really need to know the recipient. Some people appreciate home made, refurbished, antique, previously loved gifts and others are insulted. I have one circle of friends that has agreed to an “edible only” gift exchange. Another group of mine always does a white elephant party so we all know the “gifts” will be gently used items. If you agree ahead of time to do something frugal than you lessen the risk of insulting the recipient.
Kristen Smith
That’s a great point about keeping in mind which children are getting new gifts and which are getting used to make sure things are even. Children definitely notice those things!
Stacy
I love everything about this post! 🙂 I try to find a lot of our gifts at our local consignment sales and my children are always giddy over them!
Kristen Smith
Thanks, Stacy!
Marsela
We usually stick to new toys and used books and used clothes/ shoes. We have some awesome secondhand stores near us and I love getting over the top fancy dresses there that we couldn’t afford otherwise. Another thing we did a few years back was put together a dress up trunk with all thrift store finds. That was a hit. We shop at thrift stores regularly. One of my girls got a $20 gift card to goodwill from a grandparent and was over the moon!
🙂
Kristen Smith
The dress up trunk sounds like a super fun idea! We have four (soon to be five) girls, so dress up is always happening here.
Bonnie
Great post! Second hand gifts are a great way to get gifts that are normally out of my price range. I was able to get my 5 year old the coveted KeVA p!anks for his birthday by shopping second hand on EBay. They run $50 new for a 200 piece set. I got them gently used for $20. ( birthday budgets here are $30/person)
Kristen Smith
Yahoo for a great find, Bonnie! I agree, we’ve often been able to give a gift that’s usually out of our budget by finding it used.
Misty
We have always had some handmade gifts and some nice used things given as gifts to our children throughout the years. Shopping at thrift stores and yard sales was second nature to them. My children are grown now and some of them have children of their own. My daughters especially, who also happen to be in charge of the family budgets, frequent all the local thrift stores. This year, my husband and I decided to start shopping early and purchase all gifts either second hand or hand made. We shared our plans with our grown children and they were thrilled! My favorite purchase so far has been the vintage dollhouse with all furniture included, for my 10 year old granddaughter. I know she will love it! Years ago, my husband built her a wooden barn and I painted it. We had been collecting the little animals for it since she was an infant. She was over the moon excited and still plays with it. Every birthday, we add a new animal. This child asks to go to flea markets, thrift and antique stores as an outing. Our Black Friday shopping plans are to go to the thrift stores and the vintage market places, take our time and enjoy our shopping!
Kristen @ Smithspirations
What awesome family traditions you’ve developed, Misty! The dollhouse and barn sound just delightful.
Aimee
my son’s main Christmas gift was purchased from a second hand place. I was able to purchase a bike for $14. I try to avoid buying things that are in poor condition, but find buying second hand a huge help to our holiday budget.
Kristen @ Smithspirations
Bikes are on our list for our oldest two this year, Aimee. I really hope to find quality secondhand bikes at a good price, or I think they’ll have to wait. $14 is fantastic!
Jill York
I’m all for consignment gifts that are in good shape! I bought ones of my daughters a large doll house from a consignment shop one year for Christmas because I could not afford a new one, and they all still play with it. 🙂
Mama2eight
Secondhand gifts depend on the receiver. I repurposed or reworked a few of my sister’s clothes to share with nieces. My sister had died a few years before. I have received reworked pieces. I think the important part is the heart, the quality and the receiver.
We got in big trouble one year! One of my husband’s brother gave use a big game that didn’t match our family. They were eager to play it, but I wanted to return it. Next year, we wrapped it up so they could enjoy it. There was supposed to be a card with it, but it didn’t make it. It was to say something like, “We can see that you like this game so much, that you should have it.” They opens it without the card. Made a lot of happy noises about the gift. Later we hear from the other brother, that was a big NO NO! We haven’t see them at Christmas since. Sad… There must to be more going on though…
You really have to be careful! It depends on the receiver and the heart.
a woman
depends depends for who… yes, for me there is no problem about this; also I will buy second hand common gifts for a family. But for the other people could be a big NO. Another idea is to buy a gift for a all family ( for example a movie card, or a gameboard etc)
There are the other shopping that I can do it second hand for Christmas: cooking pots, the decorations, or family activities and to not cut from the budget for kids gifts , but to keep it small.
I will not aprreciate a gift from a part of person that has financial issues; I definitely prefer a handmade gift than to know they pushed the budget just to show off.
Julie
Years ago, i purchased second hand dolls and doll clothes for my daughter. I felt horribly guilty and sad when she opened up the gift on Christmas. She never knew they were used, but i always felt a twinge of guilt when i saw them.
We also had a friend who gave my youngest a used gift on her birthday. We have large parties, and one of the other children said loudly “that looks like its not new, why isn’t it in a box?” Her (friends) face just turned bright red and she didn’t say anything.
So, i would have to say no to the second hand gifts.
Audra
I do most of my clothing and shoes for my children from a second hand thrift store. I do handmade gifts for most of my family for christmas , and I keep an eye out for for new things that have been sent to thrift stores. We would not be able to afford some of the things we have given them if it weren’t for that. We also keep a low budget and only do purposeful gifts. All I can say is Thank God for thrift storstores and regifting!
Marijke
Christmas can be a huge financial burden, especially for large families with extremely limited means. My husband and I usually buy ours and our kids clothes from second hand stores in wealthy areas, our favorite is goodwill on 50% off Saturdays. A few months ago we decided to branch out a bit and look at more than just clothing. We were floored by all the practically new toys, beautiful home decor, decent furniture, kitchen ware, and electronics and couldn’t believe we never bothered to look before! This year we decided to test the waters and bought nearly everything for Christmas second hand. We did have to get boxes because very few items were still boxed, but many friends and acquaintances stepped up to the plate and gave us their various Amazon/various online store shipping boxes that were just destined for the trash anyways. We were very nervous about how the kids would react even though we were very careful about the condition of everything we got. With 4 kids (ranging in age from 4- 14yrs) we often end up spending over $1000 for very little. This year however was the largest haul ever with a lot of the usually pricier got items that we could never really afford before and spent less than $500, meaning we could afford to go out and participate in other fun Christmas activities with the kids that we avoided before over cost. The kids LOVED everything, their faces as they opened their gifts said it all. We even asked our 14 year old what he thought of his thrift store gifts and he thought we were messing with him about them being second hand. Totally doing Christmas and birthdays this way from now on and shopping throughout the year!