Healthy HomeIf you are stressing out about a messy house or not having time to get everything done, here are 7 homemaking rules to consider breaking.
By Sarah Mueller, Contributing Writer
Have you heard the story about the woman who always cut the end off of her pot roast before cooking it? That’s how her mother had always done it, so that’s what she did. One day, she asked her mother the reason for this step and her mother laughed, “Oh, I just did that so it would fit in the pot!”
Lots of the things we do as homemakers stem from things we learned from our own mothers or mentors. But not all of them are relevant or necessary for us today. Especially if you are stressing out about a messy house or not having time to get everything done, you may find some freedom and extra time by reconsidering how you do things at home.
Here are 7 homemaking rules you should consider breaking.
1. Don’t fold socks.
I’m surrendering in the war against unmatched socks. My kids just dump their loose socks into their drawers and grab 2 matching socks when they’re getting dressed. Easy peasy. When I’m decluttering the kids’ clothing, I’ll match all the socks up and look for strays.
2. Don’t wait to do a full load of laundry
I know some of you just gasped in shock, but bear with me. After I how to declutter and organize my closet, I learned that I needed to start washing my own clothing separate from the children’s to keep it in better shape.
This means I often don’t have a full load. I’ve decided it’s more important to have clean clothes than to do the laundry as efficiently as possible.
3. Don’t bother with several different types of cleaners.
Go shopping and you’ll find hundreds of different cleaners. But you really don’t need all those products. You probably can get by with just 3 cleaners: an all purpose cleaner, a glass cleaner and a toilet bowl cleaner.
You’ll free up room in your cupboards and your budget and cut back on the chemicals in your home. If you make your own cleaners, you’ll save even more. Get 5 natural homemade cleaning recipes here.
4. You don’t have to follow a cleaning schedule.
Sure I love checklists and schedules at LEAST as much as you do. I even have 50 household checklists and printables on my blog. But here’s a secret – now that I’ve been a wife and mom for 20 years, I don’t use a formal cleaning checklist. I just look around at what needs to be done, jot down a list and get to work.
5. Don’t think you have to do all the housework!
I don’t have a problem instructing my kids to do chores. However, I thought as the stay-at-home mom, I shouldn’t ask my husband for help. This was a big mistake and left me burned out.
Lately I’ve asked him for help when he’s home. He’s been so sweet to pitch in. It’s so much more enjoyable to do housework together.
6. Don’t think you must dry every dish before it’s put away.
Am I the only one who is obsessive about this? Not anymore! I lined my shelves with shelf liner and now we put away dishes straight out of the dishwasher even if they are still a bit damp.
7. Don’t think you must scrimp and save every penny.
As keeper of the household budget, I felt it my duty to squeeze every possible penny out of our budget. But that’s not necessary for our family right now. I was making unnecessary extra work for myself.
Sure, hanging all our laundry to dry might save a little money but it’s a lot more work. Similarly, making all our baked goods from scratch takes time. Now I compromise on some store-bought treats once in a while.
Giving myself grace in this area has brought me so much freedom.
3 homemaking “rules” to keep
I say “rules” because they’re just my own rules; you should feel free to ignore them completely if they’re not right for your family. But I have found when I stick to these rules, I’m much happier.
- Clean up the kitchen completely at least once a day, preferably twice. Here’s a simple tip to keep your house cleaner without extra work.
- Tidy common areas completely once a day. Clutter makes me cranky. A few minutes picking up stray throw pillows and books at night makes for a nicer morning.
- Keep the shoes outside. Four boys and a puppy bring in all kinds of dirt. Keeping the shoes outside keeps the floors a lot cleaner.
Above all, please give yourself grace.
We moms have enough pressure put on us by the world; we don’t have to make it worse by internalizing all these expectations about the ways things “should” be.
Jessica
I don’t iron most of our clothing. I just toss it in the dryer with a damp cloth, unless it has some really stubborn wrinkles or seams that won’t stay flat.
Sarah Mueller
Same here! I steer toward clothing that doesn’t need ironing. My kids hardly know what an iron is 🙂 I probably should teach them eventually…
Cathy
My mom always said “if it isn’t wash & wear, it’s wash & pitch!” ?
Christa Upton
Love the sock idea!
Sarah, you seem like a very sweet person, and I hate to write this. (I don’t like writing negative or “argumentative” comments, ever. 🙂 )
But, I would like to bring up a point about damp dishes in the cupboard–this can create an environment ripe for mold. 🙁 As the water evaporates, it creates an area of high humidity in the cupboard, assuming the door is shut most of the time. Many people don’t realize this, but humidity levels over 50% or 60% can grow mold even if there is not an actual water leak or water damage. Mold can then grow on the wood parts inside the cupboard.
And with shoes kept outside, you’d want to make sure they don’t ever get even damp, because they are hard to dry out. Mold will probably grow within 48 hours. (Or maybe I’m confused on what you meant about shoes. 🙂
I feel passionate about this because mold ruined my life (physically, not spiritually. 🙂 ) Granted, a little mold in a cupboard is not likely to ruin someone’s life. lol (The hidden mold in our house was tremendous, long story short.) But mold is toxic to everyone, even if just a little.
On the other hand, hanging laundry out to dry makes it pick up allergens and even outdoor mold toxins, so now you can feel good knowing that using the dryer is actually healthy. 😀
Sarah Mueller
Oh, thank you for your sweet comment, Christa! You are right – too much moisture in the cupboards would certainly create a problem. I was more referring to a drop or two on a plate or a bowl that didn’t completely dry in the dishwasher, nothing more than that. I had noticed that even one drop on the bottom of a dish would leave a water spot on the inside of the drawer and I didn’t want to ruin the finish so I always insisted on every dish being perfectly dry. But with plastic drawer liners, a drop here and there doesn’t leave a mark.
About the shoes, we leave them in our garage so they don’t track dirt into the house, although certainly if they’re wet, I dry them out in the dryer or near a heating vent.
I’m sorry you had to deal with mold – I have heard how awful that can be. Thanks again for joining the conversation! I do appreciate your thoughts.
Christa Upton
Thank you for your kind words! I knew I must be missing something about the shoes! lol I was picturing outside on a patio. 🙂
Sarah Mueller
lol
barbara
Great tips!! I do many of these already and it does make my life a ton easier. I would add one tip regarding the socks.
I personally did what you suggested and just left all the socks unfolded but after awhile, honestly, it just added more stress to my morning trying to find a match in the drawer.
I have a 3 and 2 year old who had a million pairs of different socks with most of them missing their other half. Finally I decided to throw ALL their socks away. All of them. Then I bought a ten-pack of plain white socks for my daughter and a ten-pack of white socks (with a grey tip for distinction) for my son. Doing this has decreased clutter in their sock drawer and now there’s no more time wasted looking for matches- and no need to fold, since all the socks are the exact same 🙂
Sarah Mueller
Ooh – great tip! Then it wouldn’t matter if one sock gets a hole since they all match each other.
Butterweed
I like this idea a lot!
Bethany Lotulelei
Excellent tips! My husband is the one who started taking his shoes off at the door, and the carpet that was new a few years ago is still as fresh as a daisy because of this! Visitors notice the shoe rack, and take their shoes off without saying a word. I am going to try to keep my kitchen cleaner. I tend to let dishes build up until I have to spend hours washing them, which has become a terrible habit. Alas.
Sarah Mueller
Thanks, Bethany! Dishes are my least favorite chore 🙂
Judy
Bethany, I’m not sure if you are hand washing or using a dish washer, but I use a dish washer. I used to stress about something that didn’t come as clean as I liked and I would go to extra effort to hand clean it. No more, now I just leave it in and refashion it again, may be even again if need be.
Olivia
I never iron clothes. The only thing that really needs it are my husband’s dress shirts, and I let him iron as he needs them. I do fold right away to minimize wrinkles in the rest of the clothes.
I keep cleaning wipes in each bathroom to make quick cleañ ups easier even though it’s more expensive. Ditto the swiffer wet. It’s so much easier to wipe up a sticky spot if ddon’t have to get out the mop and bucket.
Erin
I only iron a few times/year! My poor mom irons every day! I think it can be a generational thing too!
Karen
Us kids had ironing lessons growing up in the 1960’s. We started out with pillowcases, and graduated to shirts. I still iron now, but it is mostly inherited, hand-embroidered linens that I dare not put in the dryer.
Sarah Mueller
I think my mom used to have to iron sheets when she was a girl. Times do change, don’t they?
Viki
I discovered handheld steamers a few years ago. So much faster and easier on my back than ironing.
Melia
I wash whites with colors. I no longer use softener on every load either. I still match my husbands socks because he says he is out of socks when I don’t. Vacuuming every day helps me feel like the house is cleaner+ I have to pick up in order to do it. – yes, I realize I’m the only person left on earth that still has carpet in almost every room. Clorox wipes are always found in at least four rooms- wipe as you go!
Erin
Great tips! We JUST got rid of our carpet downstairs this summer! My parents still live in a fully-carpeted home! I can’t bring myself to wash whites with colors, but I hear it’s wonderful!
a woman
I don’t iron.
I wash the dishes once for 2 days (don’t tell me to my mother in low, ssst).
I will keep the rules with socks because last time my daughter had different color socks.
Tara
I am probably close to the worlds worst housekeeper! Seriously, I am. I’m an all or nothing kind of gal. Either my house is sparkling from top to bottom, or we are barley surviving around here. Despite this fact, I HATE having a messy house and so does my husband. One thing I do is overwork and underpay our children…I think that’s really the key to success! ? We regularly play a game that I named “Beat the Clock.” I set the timer for 30 minutes and the kids are off. They know that they have 30 minutes to clean-up to my specifications {which they’ve learned through trial and error and some tears}, or I will clean up…and they don’t want me cleaning up. I just grab a big black trash bag, shove everything into it, and take it to the Goodwill. I’ve done it a couple of times, so they know I’m serious. This pre-clean I have them do, makes my life so much less stressful. Then I set the clock for myself for an hour {or two if the house is really bad} and clean as quickly as I can. This cleaning game had allowed me to abandon my all or nothing technique that was not working for us.
Cathy
Tara, when my boys were young, we used to do “chinese fire drills”. While watching our favorite TV shows, we would each run to a room & clean for 5 minutes during the commercial breaks.
There were never any complaints cause it was fun to beat the clock & see how much we could get done in so short a time & the reward was not missing our show..
Lisa
How do you keep the shoes from getting full is dust and dirt if kept outside? What do you do in the winter months?
Jackie
She doesn’t leave them outside, they just aren’t worn around the house. Shoe bench or shoe rack? Mud room? Lots of places for shoes without tracking them all over the house.
[email protected]
Great list! I like the idea about not folding socks, it reminds me that my mother just laughed at me recently for taking time to fold rags! I don’t know why I even bothered, they were just in the laundry basket, so I started folding! I am also thankful for my husband helping out a lot around the house, he’s really awesome about it. 🙂
Sarah D.
Did anybody else find this confusing (at least at first)? The first rule to break is “Don’t fold socks”? The article title and the items on the list don’t match up, and I was trying to figure out why “don’t fold socks” is a homemaking rule!! 🙂
Caitlin
This is a great list- I always feel pressured to keep up with cleaning lists and doing everything by myself, I was so unhappy and stressed! It’s great to see not everyone keeps up with all the checklists. I love the end of the sock war- it takes so much time and no one cares!
Patsie
We use paper plates! And my daughter doesn’t fold socks either -and doesn’t care if she or her 3 children are wearing socks that match. They just wear mismatched socks & it’s so cute! (And in the winter, under pants & boots, does it really matter?)
Kathy
I own a small cleaning business and one leaner I NEVER use is glass cleaner! Plain water and a dry washcloth work great!! (A 95 yr old lady taught me that) also e-cloth makes a great glass cloth. Although wood floors are prettier, I always tack on extra to my bid for non carpeted floors. If there are two rooms with similar furniture in them, one with wall to wall carpeting and one with wood floors and rugs… I charge more for wood floors with rugs because it takes longer to clean. I have to vacuume the area rug, then lift up the edges and get under about 6″, then vacuume the wood floor around the edge of the rug, then mop the wood floor around the rug … Another delight I’ve discovered that my clients love is an old fashioned feather duster! Gets in the nooks and crannies.
Emily
I don’t wait for a full load to run the dishwasher. I run it every night before bed, full or not. My 11 year old son unloads it first thing in the morning so it is empty and ready to be filled throughout the day. I also keep the dishwasher utensil caddy in the sink so it is that much easier to fill throughout the day with dirty silverware.
When I stick to this routine I never have dirty dishes in the sink!
Galia
I love a tidy house and I always insist on the house being tidy before we go out or away so its tidy when we get home and it must be tidy before bed. We have 5 children including twin boys and 3 younger girls and they have always been brought up to help out with the tidying. When we are getting visitors- even on short notice – all the kids knew what had to be done and it was a mad scurry to tidy up before they got there including hiding tbe washing baskets – it was kinda fun – then we would sort it out later when they had gone ? If there’s a storm everyone knows the floor needs to be clear and chairs pushed in case the power goes off (& the kettle boiled!!?) this also applies at night for safety so they don’t trip or run into stuff going to the loo during the night!
I never ever iron – I don’t buy cotton shirts or dresses etc only easy care fabrics.
I hang all towels sheets bras jeans denim skirts nightie etc and put everything else in the dryer due to limited time and hanging space.
We buy bulk socks all the same for each person. And different color undies for each person to make sorting easier and this is done by the youngest ones – we only fold sheets and towels and jeans/work trousers – everything else goes I to the drawer unfolded- they rummage anyway so I don’t see the point and its worked for the last 22 years ?
We always unpack the dishwasher as soon as its cooled and it goes away damp or not – but I do put plastic on the bench til dry so I’m not stacking wet plastic bowls or containers.
I have a roomba which I love and can’t be without!!
I never use glass cleaners- just a damp microfiber cloth followed by a dry one and it works great ?
I have started making all my own cleaning goods in the last year and I just love it ? I make laundry powder and liquid and dryer sheets which I use in washing machine too and wood cleaners shoe polish dishwasher tablets foaming soap air fresheners fabric spray all purpose cleaning spray shower cleaner etc etc and I derive great joy from this. Its quick and easy and saves heaps of money and is healthier?
I have started making jam and have made my own bread and ice cream for years. It’s fun and the kids love it.
We all pitch in as we have a busy business to run outside the home and I have homeschooled for many years.
It’s important to work out what works for your family and don’t stress too much about things that really don’t matter ?
Great post thank you ???
Galia
Just to clarify … the socks ?… we have different socks for each person .. just bulk ones for each so it’s easier to find a pair quickly and easy to sort ?
Also work boots and gumboots stay outside but we each have a shoe bin in our rooms ?????
Nikki
We clean the kitchen completely after dinner every night. I’ve even started having one of my nine year olds seeep under the table after dinner. We have ten ppl do crumbs add up quickly! Waking up to a clean kitchen is my favorite so I don’t feel like I’m behind all day. It gets unloaded after breakfast and I just put dishes in the dishwasher as the sink gets full. I have littles and they aren’t allowed to touch my dishwasher just yet. We fold socks though once I can’t find a mate after two or three laundry sessions (laundry is done every Saturday) I throw the socks away.
I don’t iron regularly but will when it is necessary. My older girls know how to iron because I have cloth napkins and hate them being wrinkled!
Delegating has made my life easier but it is a new thing for me because my children are just now getting at a truly helpful age where I don’t have to go back and redo things