Do you feel like your efforts as a mom go unnoticed, and that you’re not measuring up to the polished Pinterest version of perfection? There’s so much more to being a great mom, and humility will help you to see that!
Guest post by Heather of God Centered Mom
It kind of snuck up on me, that feeling of “am I doing enough?”
I can’t quite remember which event started the avalanche of yuck.
Maybe it was a video my friend posted on Facebook of her daughter playing the violin. Or perhaps seeing the Instagram pic of homemade/gluten free bread a friend made with her kids. Maybe even the perfectly coordinated birthday party we attended with every detail handmade and themed.
Whatever the catalyst, I now sat on the couch, with a tear-stained face, lamenting to my husband all the ways I failed our children (forgetting my own post about how you will not fail in motherhood).
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Should I sign them up for piano? Does he wish I decorated our home better? Is it bad I bought a cake for our 4th son’s birthday party or should I have made one?
And he responded, “Does any mom believe she is doing a good job?” Hmmm…good point.
I want to be a great mom, but compared to my peers it seemed I fell short of great.
Fortunately, the next morning during my quiet time, the Lord led me to Christ’s words,
“Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant…just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:26-28
There I found the truth my mom heart needed. The truth that being a “great mom” in God’s eyes required humble service (even if you’ve been up since 2:45 am). Giving and doing and working, not to gain approval from other moms, but to follow Jesus’ example of giving his life for us.
- Being a great mom isn’t throwing a Pinterest perfect birthday party; it’s throwing another load of laundry in the washing machine.
- Being a great mom isn’t signing your child up for all the sports/music/camps activities, it’s saying yes to reading your son’s favorite book for the third time that day.
- Being a great mom isn’t having perfectly behaved children, but directing your children’s hearts to a perfectly loving Savior.
- Being a great mom isn’t having the best decorated home, but filling that home with laughter, joy and comfort.
- Being a great mom isn’t about working hard to look good, but serving well out of love.
The thing about humbly serving your family is you won’t get applause from your peers. Washing dishes won’t go “viral.” But God sees you pouring out your life in service to your family.
Heart of Service…
No matter what, basic tasks have to be done around my home. Those boys keep needing food and clean clothes. every. single. day. And we also like to partake of a little fun around our home, not just the mundane chores.
In both of those areas of service (chores and fun), being a “great mom” requires looking at my motives; figuring out if my actions come from love or for approval.
For we know, “The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7).
I can throw a beautiful birthday party for my son out of a pure heart. Because I know that act of service speaks to his love language.
That’s different from planning the perfect Angry Birds party only to impress my friends. Especially if I end up yelling at my boys, “Don’t touch the hand-painted Angry Bird rubber balls!” (yes, that was me…I don’t miss the irony of an angry mom over an angry bird).
If I set-up a fun Pinterest activity with my boys and start to micromanage, then I probably need to stop and do a heart check.
Because showing them love by painting a cute picture with marbles is one thing. Making sure they don’t roll the marble too much, ruining the cute Instagram picture opportunity, that’s a whole other issue.
True greatness looks nothing like what we often celebrate. Will you join me and redefine “great mom”? Learning to serve those we love most from a pure heart.
With the new definition in mind, what ways are you going to be a “great mom” today? Laundry? Toilet Cleaning?
Heather MacFadyen has been married since the turn of the century (which sounds more impressive than it is). She is the mother of four young boys (born exactly, to the day, within 6 1/2 years . . . just like she’d always planned). Heather writes about motherhood and chronicles the messy journey of “relentlessly replacing ‘me’ with ‘He’” — sharing the daily struggle of remaining God-centered while mothering four wild-at-heart, energetic, and often stubborn boys. You can also find her sharing thoughts on growing godly men over at The MOB Society.