This post was originally published December 19, 2011.
Away in a Manger. Silent Night. Joy to the World. Go, Tell it on the Mountain. Carol of the Bells. Oh, Holy Night. Oh Come, Oh Come, Emmanuel.
It’s hard to escape the sounds of the season. And why would you want to escape the beautiful music in this season of singing?
But today I want to speak to some of you who truly may want to just plug your ears if you hear another Christmas carol. And why would anyone want to do that?
Perhaps it’s been a hard year.
Maybe you’ve lost your job. Or a baby. Or a loved one.
Maybe you can’t sell your house, and it’s hard right now to make ends meet. Maybe you desire a child, and it’s just not happening. Maybe your marriage is on the rocks.
Maybe this Christmas season you want to celebrate through singing…but all you hear is silence.
I have been there. And I can never, ever say “I know how you feel.” Because, truly, each and every situation is unique. I do not know how you feel.
But I have been in seasons of loss, in financial hardship, in painful relationships. And all I heard was silence. And the last thing I wanted to do was sing.
My favorite Christmas carol has always been “Oh, Holy Night.” But there is an old hymn I discovered a few years ago that is a new favorite of mine–and perhaps it is because it speaks to those times when we truly don’t feel like singing.
The song is called “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day.” And as the story goes, the great American poet, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, penned the words to this great hymn (originally a poem) after a tragic year of personal loss. His wife had died, the Civil War had broken out, and his son had been severely wounded in battle.
As you will hear in the following version by Casting Crowns, the song points to bells proclaiming “peace on Earth.” Peace–on that Christmas Day–felt nonexistent to Longfellow. At the sound of the bells, he next wrote:
And in despair I bowed my head
‘There is no peace on earth,’ I said,
‘For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.’
But then, in the midst of great tragedy and seemingly silence from God, Longfellow comes back to what he knew was true, despite his great mourning:
Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
‘God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men.’
I hope you enjoy the following rendition of “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day” by Casting Crowns:
And, as a bonus, here is another one of my “new” favorites: “Here with Us,” sung by Joy Williams.
Jenn K
This season is just overwhelming for me. We home school 4 kids, i work 40+ hours a week, and my husband isn’t able to work right now. I have kept it simple but lost the reason. I needed this post today. thank you.
Erin
I pray the next few days will be more peace-filled for you and your family, Jenn!!
Carrie
Thank you for this post. It has been a difficult year for our family. Our young daughter was diagnosed with a serious autoimmune kidney disease last fall when we were home on furlough. Multiple moves in NC since we normally live in Russia, my father suddenly diagnosed with terminal cancer in September with his death 4 weeks later. Add a couple of sad family issues and it has been a hard year. I love what you wrote, “But then, in the midst of great tragedy and seemingly silence from God, Longfellow comes back to what he knew was true, despite his great mourning.” So grateful His Truth prevails over our difficult times and not so difficult times.
Erin
I am so, so sorry for your loss! I pray you are enveloped in God’s peace that passes all understanding this season!
Robbie
I have always loved the song Silent Night. And now silence, as you put it, evades me. I suffer from bipolar and I am suffering worse than ever. Silence….it’s all I ever hear; Silence…it’s all around me; Silence…..fills my life. This is a hard season right now, but pray that soon a better season will come a long.
Heather
I’m praying for you, Robbie. I thought I was sailing along doing really well, then today it seemed like I crashed and burned. I’m so thankful to have found this post. Know that you are not alone. The Holy Spirit is with you always, and so are others, like you, who are feeling the effects of the holidays. After 40 years with depression I am finally realizing I need to reach out to my support network at times like these, but it is very, very difficult to do. Don’t be afraid to let family and friends know how you are feeling. And be sure to stay in close contact with your mental health practitioners. They need to know how you are feeling to know how to help you. Hang in there!
Erin
Thank you for encouraging and praying for the body!!
Erin
I am praying for you right now, Robbie! As Heather suggested, please, please reach out to someone near you and let them know you are struggling. I hope you sense God’s presence tonight!
Colleen
Thank you for this post!
Erin
I hope you were blessed! Merry Christmas!
April
It has been a very difficult year in our family. I am enjoying making Christmas special for my 3 year old son, but times I feel weary and tearful and overwhelmed. Thanks for your post.
Erin
I pray you are enveloped with the Lord’s PEACE that passes all understanding this week!
Tara Ziegmont
Like all the others, I needed this. Thank you for publishing it. I lost my mother on July 30 after an 8-month grueling battle with pancreatic cancer, and I have had the hardest time during this holiday season. The grief lingers. So even though I try to be joyful for my two small girls, my heart still hurts so much. I’m glad I happened upon your post on Pinterest. The song is playing while I type, and it is beautiful. I might have to jump over to iTunes and download it.
Erin
Oh Tara…I am so, so sorry to hear of your great loss. My best friend/college roomie’s stepdad battled pancreatic cancer as well. My mom is still living, but she has battled ovarian cancer. I hate cancer!
I pray you are infused with HIS peace that truly passes all understanding today!
<3,
Erin
Kaya
A beautiful post. Thank you.
Erin
Thank you!
Joy
Thank you for acknowledging the fact that some of us are finding it hard just now to ‘celebrate’. Christmas is about children mostly and my children are all grown up, families of their own and live far away…we have SKYPE for which we are truly grateful. This year my husband was made redundant and handed twelve weeks notice…after 23 years in the same job…….we face an uncertain future, but God is good and we will both be at the Midnight Service tomorrow and rejoice at the real meaning of christmas and be thankful for all that we have, many have much, much less.
Erin
Wow–I am so sorry about your husband’s job, Joy! I pray you can find peace in the Lord this season!
Mary T
Erin, this message touched my heart! Last year on Thanksgiving day, I lost the second student in 3 months…(Jayla had passed on the 3rd day of school). This was most challenging for me as Eddie was also a Christmas Eve baby. I remain close to my families and pray that they are comforted by believing that Jesus brought them home to let them run free with Him. (They were both medically fragile with diagnoses of extremely rare genetic disorders.). Sometimes, we must just sing in thanks for His great love…the gift of His Only Son, our Lord Jesus Christ… a babe in a manger, our Lord and Savior… My favorite song is What Child is This? I pray for a Christmas filled with His blessings and promises of peace, love and joy for all!
Erin
Thank you for sharing your story, Mary! I pray you are filled with HIS PEACE this Christmas!!
Mary T
Erin, Merry Christmas! Hope day was blessed with the joy of celebrating the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ with loved ones and filled with peace. I was very intrigued by the song based on the poetry of Longfellow and did quite a bit of reading and thinking and praying about it….what confirmation from God I did receive when the homily at Midnight Mass was much about finding peace when we feel there may be none to be found…always receiving the gift of peace from our Prince of Peace! Just wanted to let you know that this post touched my heart in more ways than one. Loved both videos/songs! Thank you so much for sharing! May we truly keep Christmas in our hearts each and every day!
Erin
Thank you so much for sharing, Mary! What confirmation that must have been! I love it when the Lord puts the same message in front of us from several different sources all close together. Happy New Year to you!!!
dona
Just miss my best friend who died months ago and my mom to. I may be over 50 years old but having mental illness even with therapy and meds is hard
Meg
i always have a hard time this time of year. It will be 25 years Christmas Eve morning that my mom died of cancer. I hate the holidays and have a very hard time saying how I feel. If it wasn’t for my grandchildren I don’t know what I would do. I wish there was some way of getting over this
laura shannon
My husband died in Oct of this year. it’s too fresh, to feel like celebrating anything.
Lori
Thank you so much for this! I have always been joyful throughout the holidays, but this year I have completely ignored the season in every sense. My husband, our 5-year-old and I moved to my husband’s country of origin, forcing me to leave behind my two grown sons and my precious grandson. I am heartbroken! Christmas is such a happy time in our home, and I feel so empty because I’m not there to bake cookies, cook for everyone, etc. I speak to my boys daily, but cry as soon as we’re off the phone. Life is better where we are for our little one, but the guilt I carry is unbearable. This post warmed my heart and reminded me to celebrate for my littlest guy so that he can know the joy of Christmas that I shared with my other two when they were small. Merry Christmas to you!
Connie
This is my first Christmas since losing my daughter in January after she died giving birth. My husband and I are raising her baby and now eight year old in addition to our three teenagers. It has been a year of joy in the birth of our sweet granddaughter immediately followed by heartache and loss when her mom died from childbirth complications. It has, also, been a year of adjustments for our whole family but God is using this situation to bring good. Through it all God has a plan, we just need to remain faithful, stay in his will and follow the plan.
Thank you for this article that acknowledges the holidays are more difficult during times of hardship and grief. Sometimes turning the focus off ourselves to helping others helps. Best wishes for a Merry Christmas and blessed new year.
Kristi
I just read ur post after posting my own immediately after urs. I am so sorry for the loss of ur daughter and I will try to use ur words as an inspiration to me to trust that God always has a plan and to give thanks in everything.
Kristi
My family is incredibly blessed. I think I may be suffering from survivor guilt since we are all healthy when people all over the country and the world are dying from covid. I am always grateful for the birth of Jesus but I dont feel like throwing a party when there is so much sadness in our country.
Erin
It is a very hard year to feel like celebrating for sure. 😢
Christy
Thank you for this post. Like so many others I was having a difficult time finding joy in the Christmas season this year. My sister and dad were in a car accident while out of town in August. He passed away and she was in intensive care several hundred miles away for almost 3 months. She is home but struggling with addiction to pain medication and has no permanent place to live right now. She had been living with our brother but his health took a turn for the worse and he is now in assisted living. Their situations break my heart daily. My beloved pet of 18 years died in October and my precious father in law passed unexpectedly a week before Thanksgiving. As you can imagine, celebrating anything right now is extremely difficult. I have found my tolerance for anything more than basic living is very low. However, as I was driving the other day O Holy Night came on the radio and the words “a thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices, for yonder breaks a new and glorious morn”. I had heard and sung those words a hundred times before, but suddenly it felt as if they were being spoken directly to me. Although I don’t feel much like celebrating this year I do have hope that I won’t always feel this way, that my heart will heal and that life will be joyful once more.